I'm onto something ❤️🔥
More clarity. This time with heart and fire
Last weeks post helped me purge some of the fear, some of the shame, and gave me the pick-me-up to try-try again. Writing helps get the ‘ick’ out of your head. I found some clarity.
A few days later I picked up the iPhone and opened the TikTok and had another go at delivering my message.
This time what was different is that the message I wanted to share was something I actually just told a close friend. I encouraged them to reach out to a person they admire (and are mutuals with) and DM them. So it was like making that FaceTime, telling a story for a specific audience. (popular advice on TikTok: talk to the cam like you’re on FaceTime with a friend).
I tell you the relief and joy I had. Like a giant hurdle between me and the future was lifted. I started seeing that I could do this thing. The video is not polished, it’s a bit awkward, and in terms of content, it’s so-so. But for me there’s a glimmer of something, that can be improved on and that’s where my energy moves.
TALKING TO YOUNG, UNCONVENTIONAL PEOPLE ABOUT THINGS I LEARNED OVER THESE 2.5 DECADES OF ADULTHOOD AND EVENTUALLY, HOPEFULLY,
HELP THEM FIND THEIR SUCCESS (however they define).
With 4 months of reflecting and quiet under my belt there’s finally something bubbling to the surface. I don’t want to hold back anymore. I think the grip of fear is loosening.
I do have a unique story. I can find my ‘lane’ and use my voice with its experiences to at least share with others, maybe uncover things for them as well.
With Lex I continue to define success when people on Lex found one another seemingly “flung out of space" to creating a bond of love and friendship. By this definition I was supremely successful. Uncontrollably successful. There is so much love was created through this idea that conceived. I need to remember that this is special.
Thank you for reading this notebook. I’m off to write more video content.